Between the lines

winter
paints everything black and white
distorts your sense of direction
breathes coldly on your velvet skin
which enveloppes your beautiful face
Causes temporary numbness
Tries to stumble you
sometimes you fall
Don't let it get you down
it'll pass
Like a tornado
it'll pass

N'oublie pas mon coeur

here is another story I have written. I feel like there's somthing missing, but I can't really point my finger on what it is. Regardless, it's posted up here. Feel free to leave feedback :)

Happy reading!

It is dark outside. How did it get so utterly dark out? The darkness has absorbed all the bright colours off of my surroundings; the trees, the sky, the flowers… all of these lovely things of nature are now shaded with a darkness that I cannot even define.
The chilly air is blowing around me, causing my body to recoil from itself. Where am I? I don’t know. The coldness is eating me inside out. I am lying on the firm dirt ground. I think I am on top of a tree root. There is a sharp pain throbbing on my side, right by my ribs. I want to clutch the pain, to trap it and make it evaporate into thin air, but my arms will not move. They are like lifeless rags slumped beside me. I try to lift my head, but my body will not tolerate it. How did I end up here? It looks like a forest. I try to remember but it is impossible. I close my eyes and take a huge breath of the frigid air. It is so icy that when it enters my nostrils, it seems to burn my throat. I begin to cough—no. I stop right in the middle of the cough. It hurts too much. The throbbing pain is worse now. I manage to move my right arm and touch my right side, trying to diminish the pain—I scream. It hurts. It is agonizing. I cannot describe the exact words for what I’m feeling. It hurts as if someone were stabbing me over and over in the same spot. How did I end up like this? I remove my arm from my side and bring it closer to my face, and then I smell it. That awful smell of rust and salt combined into one. Blood. I am bleeding; but how? I cannot remember anything.
I lay here for so long now, and fatigue is seeping over me and grabbing hold of me, attempting to pull me under, but I have a deep feeling that I should not give in to my exhaustion at this moment. I open my eyes. I see the dark navy blue sky. There are so many stars and the moon is exceptionally bright today; a full moon.
I stiffen—there is a sound, something is rustling in the leaves. A wave of anxiety seeps into me as the sound becomes more prominent. The pain in my ribs isn’t the only thing throbbing now. My heart is beating loudly in my ears, and for a moment it is the only sound I am able to distinguish. I squeeze my eyes shut. If it is an animal that is coming, then my death may be quite painful. I hope to fall asleep before I am devoured.
I try to remember why I am here, why I am bleeding—I can’t. Maybe my head is also bleeding, maybe I have brain damage, and I probably have amnesia …
Something gently brushes my right arm. It is not furry, it is soft and warm. I cannot imagine what type of animal would feel this way. I stiffen up, but my heart decides not to listen to me, and it starts beating much faster. I hear the creature breathing long heavy breaths. The breathing gets closer, louder. I swallow. I am not ready to die. Not this way. I want to scream. I try to open my mouth but I can’t. My body is being stubborn and won’t let me. My eyes are still tightly clamped shut, I am too afraid to see what kind of creature will kill me.
I hear its breathing getting closer, louder. Its’ warm breath is blowing against my neck. It’s a nice contrast compared to the endless coldness I have been feeling. It warms me up. I am thankful that my predator is making sure that my last moments are good.
“Nessa?” a soft velvety voice anxiously whispers into my ear. I know this voice. The voice belongs to the boy I love. I slowly pull my eyelids up, and I see him. He is sitting right next to me, so close to me. He is holding my hand. I don’t even remember feeling him take it. The fear has completely evaded my system, but now the pain quickly and greedily retrieves its place in my body.
“Rob…” I whisper. I can barely hear myself so I am not sure if Robert hears me.
“Nessa, I’m here” he exclaims, his voice vibrating off of my neck. His breath is so very warm against me. Although I am in severe pain, that same electric tingle goes through my body when Rob is close to me. It temporarily distracts me from the pain.
His warmth is so soothing; I want him here with me forever.
He softly rubs my arm. The electric tingle comes back; I want it there.
He bends over me now; his face is merely a few inches away from mine. I lose all train of thought. My heart begins to beat faster and louder, and for once I am able to feel the warmth penetrating through my ears. Robert bends his head further down, and now our lips are joined. He tenderly kisses me. Although most of my energy is drained, I muster up enough to return his kiss. I struggle to swing my arms around him. He pulls his mouth away from mine.
“Nessa, you’re bleeding!” he says. He sounds worried.
“I know” I sigh. I am out of breath from the kiss. It seems so long since we’ve last kissed.
He is no longer hovered over me. The frigid air greedily rushes back to consume me.
“Robert?” I call weakly.
“I’m here Nessa” he says. I want him to touch me again. I want him to protect me from the icy air.
He is hovered over me again now. I sigh a long deep sigh and shut my eyes, causing me to recoil because my side hurts. I open my eyes to see that he is topless. His pale white skin is glistening in the moonlight. I wonder why he is no longer wearing his shirt. He was wearing one before, I am sure of that. His defined muscles are forming little shadows where they crease and jut out.
I am lucky to have such a beautiful boy all to myself. I remember the first time I had ever laid eyes on him. I was dazed by everything about him. I remember the way his bright blue-green eyes stared deeply into mine. I remember the way our first kiss was—tentative but eager in a way.
His beauty is so very unique. He has outstandingly pale skin, but then he has immensely dark brown hair which contrasts greatly with his skin colour. I call him my angel. He is the most beautiful person I have ever met—my thoughts are interrupted by a piercing pain at my side. It already hurts, but it feels like someone has begun to stab it again. I scream.
“Shh shh, don’t worry Nessa, I’m bandaging you” he reassures me in his sweet delicious voice.
So that’s why his shirt is off. I pay more attention now, and I realise that he is wrapping his shirt tightly around my side—another twinge of pain. I manage not to scream, but I bite my lip instead. The pain on my lip temporarily distracts me from the throbbing pain in my ribs.
“Done” he exclaims as he props me up. It hurts.
He turns me so that my back is to him, and then he sets me on his lap. His arms firmly wrap around me. He is shielding me away from the cold. I lay the back of my head against his warm bare chest.
“Won’t you get cold?” I ask him.
“Don’t worry about me” he whispers into my ear. His breath is so warm against me.
He lays his chin on the top of my head. I wonder why the pain hasn’t become worse since now his arms are wrapped so tightly around me. I would have thought that the pressure would be much more painful, but instead it feels the exact opposite. I feel completely safe in my angels’ arms.
“Robert…” I begin to say, but a sudden wave of exhaustion washes through me causing me to shut my mouth.
“Yes?” he asks.
“…why…why are we here? Why am I bleeding?” I manage to mumble. My eyelids are starting to close. It is silent for a moment, but he tightens his grip on me.
“Those horrible people…” he begins. I can already hear the disgust in his voice. “I…I should have never left you alone Nessa…I…” his voice breaks and he begins to sob.
“Don’t cry Rob” I insist. I want to turn around and hug him, comfort him, but his grasp around me is much too strong.
I don’t remember anything though. I don’t know what he is talking about. He is quiet now.
“What happened?” I ask. “I can’t remember anything”
He breaths out loudly and I feel his warm breath on my head.
“Nessa, you don’t have to know what happened…I think it’s better that you don’t remember. I wish I didn’t remember…” he says calmly. I know he is right. Why would I want to be horrified at what happened when I have other things to worry about.
“Why am I bleeding then?” I manage to ask.
He stiffens and is silent for a minute.
“I’m not sure…” he finally whispers. “I…I think you were shot”
That would explain it; the pain, the blood. I wonder why I was shot, but I do not want to ask him, so I don’t.
I look down to my wound. My eyes widen. His shirt is already soaked in the sticky dark red substance. I am bleeding too much. I can feel it. That must be why I am getting so very tired. I do not want Robert to worry though, so I stay quiet. I am too late though—he has already noticed. I see his hand gently brushing his drenched shirt. He isn’t saying anything either, so I imagine that he does not want to worry me. He probably doesn’t know that I have already noticed.
He gently turns me around now—it hurts, but I stay quiet—so that I am facing him. My knees are now firmly against his stomach, and my head is facing his chest. He hugs me close so that my face presses against his cold chest. I worry that he might get hypothermia. If I must die, I do not want him to lose his life merely because he had to give me his shirt so that it could absorb all of my blood.
He rests his chin on my head again. He inhales and then sighs. I burry my face deeper into his chest and blow on it; I am trying to warm him.
“I love you Nessa” he whispers suddenly.
My heart skips a beat. He knows that I will not make it. I know I will not make it.
“I love you too” I say weakly into his chest. My voice is muffled.
He removes his chin from my hair and looks down at me. I take my face away from his chest and look up at him. Even though it is dark, I can still define his bright blue-green eyes. It’s a shame it is so utterly dark. Since I’m dying, I deserve to see the beauty of his eyes in the sunlight. Life isn’t fair though, and I am aware my wish to see his eyes perfectly won’t come true.
He bends his head towards mine and gently brushes his soft full lips against my cheek, to my nose, and then they lock onto my mouth. His lips are cold, as are mine. His breath is warm though, and sweet. I could kiss him forever. I wouldn’t mind die kissing him. Even though I am exhausted, I manage to move my mouth in harmony with his.
His mouth stops moving against mine, and now he is breathing with his nose. His mouth is still on mine though. He exhales through his mouth, and his sweet breath pours into mine. It feels nice in my mouth; the warmth, the sweetness.
He gently pulls away then, and that’s when I realize that my eyes are closed.
“Nessa, I love you” he whispers into my ear again.
I slowly open my eyes; he is staring at me now. His face is so beautiful. I cannot believe that I will be leaving this behind.
He looks expressionless; not worried, not sad. He is trying to keep his face composed to not worry me. He is so kind. He is so perfect.
“I know” I manage to giggle weakly—the motion hurts my side. “I love you too”
He gently places his lips on mine once more and gives me a long tentative kiss.
I want to kiss him again, but exhaustion has suddenly overwhelmed me again. My time will be up soon, then. I cannot imagine what it will do to Robert. He is my love, he is my life. I am his love, I am his life. When I leave, I will be taking his life away with mine. I cannot do that. Seventeen is such a young age to die—it is also a very young age to be in love, the way Robert and I are. Our love for each other cannot be compared to anything. It cannot be described. It is much too strong for words.
It hurts me deeply to leave Robert. I would rather endure ten thousand gunshots, ten thousand stabbings over and over, than to leave Robert. I have to stay alive, for Robert. I have to.
But my body is being utterly difficult. After every pleasure, every tingly electric feeling Robert has given me, my body still chooses to shut down.
My eyes are heavy, and I can feel my breathing become slower.
Slower, Slower.
Robert is still clutching me tightly. He kisses my face everywhere. Every imaginable spot on my face, his lips are upon them. It is enough to make a slight tingle go through my body, but the current is low.
I am falling asleep now. I can feel the exhaustion take over. I am leaving him. No. I can’t. I want to cry.
I feel moisture on my face, and I am not sure whether it’s from Roberts’ kisses, or my own tears.
“Don’t forget my heart…” I hear him whisper into my ear. “…you will be taking it with you” he whispers again.
I begin to drift off, but I manage to squeeze his hand once, before the darkness permanently consumes me.

Disappear

Another story I wrote. It's not really well edited, the themes in the story are good though, I'm just not sure if I explained it right.
Have fun reading :) (or not...)



I stood there, motionless, in front of my nastiest foe. This girl had ruined my life. I had first noticed her immerging from the shadows when I was thirteen. From then on she had been following me, making it her one true goal to transform me into her. She was successful. By fifteen she had me captivated by her charm, and I was her exact copy.
I eyed her furiously; every ounce of hatred was concentrated into my eyes. The anger and hatred I felt towards her was blazing like a fire that never dies. A fire that cannot be extinguished as easily as one might like. I wanted her gone. I wanted her out of my life; forever.
I looked at her up and down and shook my head in disgust. Her hair looked as if it had been sprayed with four cups of hairspray–totally fake. Her dark brown roots were visible above the artificial platinum blonde locks of hair. She had large purple shadows beneath her huge hazel eyes, along with thick layers of makeup on her eyelids. Her over-plucked eyebrows were furrowed; a confused expression hung onto her sickening face. This despicable girl sickened me. I wished her to the fiery gates of Hades, but my wish had not been granted.
I glared at her fiercely, and to my surprise, she mimicked my action. I became overwhelmed with anger. For all these years, she’d been luring me into her sick trap, trying to get me to become her, and now that I had more power over her, she was copying my every action. “Go Away!” I shrieked, clenching my fists into tight balls. “I hate you!”
She bit her gloss-covered lip extremely hard that even I could imagine feeling the physical pain. Her eyebrows were grooved upward now, no long looking angry. She had a pained expression on her face. Good. I closed my eyes, breathing deeply and smiled smugly. I wanted her to feel every bit of regret as possible. I slowly opened my eyes, and to my dismay, she did not leave. She stood there in front of me, gazing upon me with sudden curiousness. Frustration washed through my body and seemed to stick to me like a magnet. I suddenly felt angrier than before. “Get Away!” I hissed. She did not budge. The only movement I saw from her was her chest going up and down, breathing heavily. Then, a tear appeared through the corner of her right eye, and it dripped slowly down her pink blushed cheeks, smudging her foundation and whatever other face makeup she wore to make herself further plastic. I felt triumphant for a moment, but all that victory evaded me. She still hadn’t budged. “Go. Away” I snapped again, my voice broke. I did not feel the tears though; I was too angry and frustrated to cry. Instead, my words were merely tearless sobs. I didn’t want her to feel the satisfaction of making me sob, but I wasn’t the one with tears dripping treacherously down my face. Or maybe I was crying, but I was too distracted by her presence to notice. “Why are you even here? NO ONE wants you here! If you don’t get out I swear I’ll get rid of you… my way!” I threatened. The girl did not move a muscle. Not that she had any. She was too skinny, a skeleton. Her brows furrowed, and I watched her intently as three moist tears flowed down her soft pink cheek. I did not understand; no matter how many times I slammed threatening and hurtful words into her face, she would not move. Sometimes I wondered if the words and threats I spat, hurt me more than they hurt her… She remained unmoving as more liquid drops flowed out of her sparkling hazel eyes. For a minute, I felt compassion for this girl, but all that sense of empathy quickly vanished as quickly as a heartbeat. She had ruined my life too immensely to be forgiven.
She gazed into my eyes, hers were wide with confusion. I watched as the pure clear tears became contaminated with smearing mascara. Black tears were streaming down her completely flushed face. Revolted, I turned my gaze away from her and focused on the ground I was standing on.
“You’re nothing but a fake… you know that?” I whispered, for that was as loud as my voice was letting me go. Something was blocking my voice from becoming louder. I coughed to try and get whatever it was out, but I was unsuccessful. I couldn’t breathe. And that’s when I realized that I was also crying. Horrified, I tried my best to swallow my tears back, to keep a straight face, but it was impossible. The tears began to pour out, and I heard myself gulp for air. I brusquely swallowed my last sob; I couldn’t let this monster win. I couldn’t let her have the satisfaction of making me cry. I was stronger than that.
“G-g-go A-away!” I wailed. I turned to glance at her again, and she too was crying more prominently. She stayed quiet the whole time. Her face was now almost fully covered in watered-down black tears. Nevertheless, mo matter how much I had upset her, she wouldn’t budge. She merely stood there in front of me, crying. She had a pleading expression on her face, as if begging me not to banish her.
That’s when the surge of anger zoomed through me like an electric flow. For all these years, she had been so manipulative, so evil. And now she was pleading me to spare her. I wanted to kill her right there, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it; not yet.
I tried to focus on her ugly unclean face. Her hazel eyes were completely bordered with smudged black makeup. Her cheeks were a bright shade of red. Her face was exactly that of a person who had been crying for a long period of time. Her shirt was unsightly and unoriginal. Everyone had one like it, all the girls like her. She wore a short skirt, much too short. I wanted to rip it off and wave it in front of her, but I didn’t.
“…Whore.” I muttered heatedly, jerking my gaze away from her in disgust. This human monster revolted me to the point that I thought I was going to throw up.
As my tears subsided and my anger grew more prominent, she copied me again. She pulled herself together. The tears were still all over her soft red cheeks, but she did not allow any more of the traitor liquid to seep out of her eyes. I glared at the girl with more hatred and fury than before. She was better prepared for my furious stare than I had expected and hoped. She too, glared at me with the same hatred. But then, to my victory, her angry expression faded and was replaced by that pained look that I knew all too well. I laughed to myself smugly. My eyes gleamed in triumph, widening. The girl still looked pained however, not angry. She bit her soft lip, all the gloss had disappeared along with the rest of her makeup. Her mouth opened and twitched. I knew she was about to start sulking. I could feel it. I don’t know how this sudden feeling came about, but I could feel her pain. For a moment I could feel everything she was feeling. All the frustration, all the anguish, all the hatred. Her teeth sunk deeper into the soft pink lips and her eyebrows furrowed until I thought it would cause a permanent wrinkle. A huge tear emerged out of her right eye and dripped slowly down her face.
She opened her mouth, I knew she was about to weep, and I couldn’t let that happen. The sounds of her sobs would irritate me further, and I would do something completely irrelevant. But then I had a sudden change of heart. Before the sound had a chance to escape her quivering lips, I looked at her with a sudden eagerness in my eyes. I could feel the anticipation building up inside of me, just waiting to escape–no­–to explode.
“I’ll kill you” I whispered calmly, and lurched myself at the girl. I slammed violently into the mirror, and it shattered into a million tiny pieces.

Beautiful Stalker

I've written a short story, I may leave it at that, or I may change the ending and continue it. I'm not to sure a the moment though. And also, I'd like to point out that it's very rough. No editting at all

Beautiful Stalker

I waited eagerly at my second story bedroom window. The full moon was exceptionally bright tonight and the moonlight shone into my dark room, creating glimpses of perfect white on my cream coloured blankets. My bed was placed under the window, creating a comfortable sitting area as I waited, peering out the open window, searching for him.

***

He had come every night for the past two weeks. I had first noticed him perching on the thick tree branch of the large oak beside my window while I was examining the stars, trying to define the little dipper. I had not flinched away when I saw him. I hadn’t run down the cold hard-wood stairs to my father, who was watching television that night, to tell him there was a strange boy looking into my second story room from our old oak tree. I stood still, eyeing the strange boy who was watching me. We looked into each others’ eyes for a fair amount of time, as if deciphering each others’ thoughts during the process. Then, as suddenly as he appeared, he would vanish, and I was free to fall into a deep slumber, dreaming of the strange boy.
It persisted like this for the past two weeks, nothing changing. We would not say a word to each other, we would not touch. He kept his distance, staying perched on the branch, never moving. He was like a statue on the old tree. The only part of his body that moved was his mysterious dark eyes, keeping them locked onto mine. Even in the night, I could tell that his eyes were not blue, nor green. They were either a dark brown or maybe pure black for all I knew.

***

I looked away for a moment, examining my white alarm clock that lay motionless on my dark bedside table. It was eleven thirty. He was sure to come at any minute now. My head swiftly snapped back toward the open window, and he was there, as still as a statue, perched on the thick branch closest to my window.
The moonlight shone on his pale skin, tonight he truly looked like a statue. The strange boy resembled an angel. His face was fiercely beautiful. His cheekbones were high and defined, but not in a skeletal way. His body was also one of a perfect being–he was very slim, but he had defined muscles. They didn’t bulge out so disgustingly as if he were on steroids. They were perfect. One of his legs was crossed, and the other one was bent upward so that his chin rested upon his knee. He was staring at me intently, never taking his sparkling dark eyes off of me. His dark eyes contrasted significantly with his pale–almost white–skin. A slight breeze blew around him, ruffling his already-untidy brown-gold hair. Although his hair was untidy, it still looked perfect. It was cut shorter at the sides and gradually got a bit longer as it reached the top. The breeze lead its’ way to my open window and onto my face, a sweet smell filled my nostrils. It didn’t smell like cologne though, not so artificial. It smelled something in between lilac and honey. The movement in the air would have tousled my dark brown hair around my face, but luckily I was wearing French braids. The breeze only affected my side bangs which hung loosely at the left side of my heart-shaped face.
I took a deep whiff of the air once more; the sweet aroma was still present. I exhaled loudly; he was still examining me thoroughly. Every night he would come here and watch me, as I would watch him. It was always the same routine, I wanted to change it.
I poked my head out the window into the chilly air. For the first time ever, I witnessed him move. He backed away, but only slightly so it was barely even noticeable. He didn’t take his eyes off of mine however. Every time he looked into my eyes, it seemed like he was searching for something. He always had an intent look on his face as he watched me, as if he were examining something through a magnifying glass.
To my surprise, he suddenly appeared closer to me. He was so quick that I hadn’t even noticed him move. He was at the edge of the thick branch; his body was merely two feet away from my face. He stared into my eyes, and then the right side of his mouth pulled up into a smile. I was dazed by this godlike creature. For once his expression wasn’t serious, it was…happy. His simple half smile sent my heart into a frenzy of loud thumps. I could feel the speed of it doubling almost instantly. He swiftly raised his hand and motioned with his finger for me to come out. It was almost seductive, or maybe I was imagining that part. I was dazed; all I could do was obey the angel that had so mysteriously entered my life. I knew I should have been frightened, but the fear was overruled with electricity that raced through my body telling me to go to the strange boy. He reached out this time; his long slender hands were ready to catch me. I cautiously climbed out of my window, and before I knew it, I was in the creatures’ cold arms. He cradled me against his muscular chest; it was hard as a rock, and his whole body was the temperature of the cold air surrounding us. Maybe he was a statue after all.
He pulled the elastics out of my hair, leaving my braids untied. He ran his cold fingers through my hair, separating the braids. I started breathing more heavily; I could feel my heart exhilarating. He rested his soft full lips on my hair, and I heard him inhale. Then he turned me slightly, so that I was facing him. He pulled me closer. The tighter I was pressed against this cold stone creature, the warmer I felt. “What’s your name?” he whispered into my ear. Even though his voice was a mere whisper, it sounded perfect. “Tatiana…” I answered, still dazed at how perfect he seemed.

He inhaled into my hair, and sighed. “You have a lovely name” he whispered as he brushed his lips down my head toward my jaw, his voice still as velvety and perfect as it had been a few seconds ago. I rush of adrenaline went through my body as his soft lips came closer to mine. It seemed that his lips were the only soft part of his body. They lightly brushed around my jaw, to the bottom of my ear, to my throat. I heard him sigh again. As I was about to wrap my arms around this creature, a sharp pain pierced at my neck. His teeth were still burrowed into my throat as I slipped into unconsciousness.

obsessed

obsession n. 1 the act of obsessing or the state of being obsessed.

2 a persistent idea or thought dominating a person's mind